My Journal: following through

Dropping bits of me

I used to think I was fluid till I self diagnosed my condition—I was suffering from inconsistency.

I would carefully draft up a reading plan or a daily schedule only to follow it for 5days and that was it. Weeks later, I would put up a modified version only for that to last another few days and I give up.

I used to think that I was simply experimenting, you know? That was what the scientist in me called it. Looking for better ways of doing things but I got better ways yet I didn't stick. I wasn't disciplined enough to push through.

I would try following the schedule for the first few days because of the euphoria that accompanied new processes only for it to fade with time.

The new schedule becomes another failed plan and I move to another.

Then, one day, it was the moment of truth. I had to tell myself that I was fooling me. I lacked discipline. I lacked the power to follow through.

Acknowledgement is only a first step, what did I do?

I started working on it.

I was a bit hesitant to draft up another schedule because I knew it was going to demand my all. I thought it over thoroughly.

I had to start building endurance with the seemingly little things. I started to bathe at night... again. Over the years, I had tried to form the habit only to fail again.

It was during one of such periods that I heard it took 21 days to form a habit. I had taken out a calendar and marked out the 21 days, set on my journey to habit formation. Now, I cannot remember if I got to the 21st day but I crossed the 15th, the only thing I remember is that I didn't form the habit.

So, with this new drive, I decided to start with the visible.

So far, I've kept at it. There have been nights when I just wanted to fall on the bed and sleep but I didn't and there were some I gave in. What I know right now, is that I'm not giving up on it.

I'll persist by reminding myself of the health benefits. I won't give up because I need to prove this to myself.

I will pass this and push on to creating those study plans and keep at it. I will have my daily planner and follow through.

From there, I'll build the tenacity needed to start up businesses and relationships and see them through. I am that hopeful!

So, what is it you're finding yourself inconsistent at?

Remind yourself of the benefits therein. Dare yourself to do it differently.

Paul said, "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me..." we can say the same.

If you don't mind, we can pull ourselves up.

Bye for now...